Author Topic: Nursing Home Sex  (Read 978 times)

Offline RusTy/SE

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Nursing Home Sex
« on: May 14, 2009 - 12:27:48 PM »
Nursing Home Sex...

Harold is 95 and lives in a Senior Citizen Home..
Every night after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the Center to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life.
One evening Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden.

They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have passed.
After a short lull in their conversation, Harold turns to Mildred and asks, 'Do you know what I miss most of all?'
She asks, 'What?' 'Sex!!' he replies.
Mildred exclaims, 'Why you old fart. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!'
'I know,' Harold says, 'but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while.'
Well, I can oblige,' says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it.
Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's manhood.
Then one night Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting place.  Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he was O.K.
She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident, who was holding Harold's manhood!
Furious, Mildred yelled, 'You two-timing son of a *****! What does Ethel have that I don't have?'
Old Harold smiled happily and replied, 'Parkinson's.'
Russ
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Offline Oldschool

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #1 on: May 14, 2009 - 12:31:56 PM »
 :roflsmiley:    :roflsmiley:    :roflsmiley:     :roflsmiley:    :naughty:   
Ken  --  In Georgia

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wagesofsin

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #2 on: May 14, 2009 - 07:47:45 PM »
bwahahahahahahhaha.....   :crazy:

Offline MDMoparDude

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #3 on: May 14, 2009 - 08:36:26 PM »
Hope I die before I get old.........

Offline 426HEMI

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #4 on: May 15, 2009 - 07:04:34 AM »
 :roflsmiley:   :roflsmiley:    :roflsmiley:    :roflsmiley:    :roflsmiley:  Have to remember that and hope I never get that old.   :roflsmiley:
Got a pretty good start on my M46 optioned Barracuda restoration but now it is on hold till I can gather more funds.  Still need a few parts for it.  SIU Graduate 75 AAS Automotive Tech, 94 BS Advanced Tech Studies, 1997 MSED Workforce Education and Development

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Offline whitesatinmopar

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #5 on: May 15, 2009 - 08:15:44 AM »
Russ, as they say, thats more information than I'd care to know.  :roflsmiley: Now to rid that visual image  :smilielol: Damn, that is funny. At least the old man was mentally alert.  :cheers:
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Offline BIGSHCLUNK

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #6 on: May 15, 2009 - 08:55:53 AM »
 :roflsmiley:  :roflsmiley:  :roflsmiley:  :roflsmiley:  :roflsmiley:  :roflsmiley:  :roflsmiley:

thats what I needed to start the day!!!!
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                                                  OO 
                                              [o o o o]
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Offline Bills70

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Re: Nursing Home Sex
« Reply #7 on: May 16, 2009 - 09:06:48 AM »
hey  can't blame him and he sure knew how to get what he wanted!!   :2thumbs: WOW 2 women and at his age!!