Just to document this hard to find problem, the vibration noise I was getting, most prominent at 35-40 mph was, a hmmmmmmmmm space hmmmmmmm space hmmmmmmm. Very consistent and annyoing throughout the car. I could also pick up a little vibration throught the steering wheel and seats. It sounded like tires/drivetrain, but I couldnt find anything wrong.
This was driving me crazy and the noise vibration was at the point where I didnt want to drive the car, however now, Problem solved, it was indeed the polyurethane transmission mount. Althought the manufacturer advised this could not happen, after swapping their new $50.00 poly tranny mount and going back to the $10.00 stock rubber mount (that matched the rubber engine mounts), the car runs smooth with absolutely no vibration whatsoever. I would not recommend mixing the material types poly/rubber between the engine and tranny mounts. I don't know if poly mounts are availale for the engine and if they would have interacted differently with the poly tranny mount, however in the future, I will stay with all rubber.