>
>1. Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with
>coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in. Calling AAA is not an
>option; I will win.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>2. Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop
>the
>hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If
>another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be
>able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and
>everything, I wouldn't know where to start" We will then drink a couple
>of beers and break wind, as a form of holy communion.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>3. Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me
>soup
>and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You're a woman. You
>never get as sick as I do, so for you, this is no problem.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>4. Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at
>the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic
>items like "cumin" or "tofu." For all I know, these are the same thing.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>5. Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will
>insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me
>twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back
>together.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>6. Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote control in my
>hand
>while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole
>show looking for it . . . though one time I was able to survive by
>holding a calculator. (applies to engineers mainly)
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>7. Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about.
>The true answer is always either sex, cars, sex, sports or sex. I have
>to make up something else when you ask, so don't ask.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>8. Because I'm a man, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your
>mother come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her
>any more than I have to. Whatever you got her for Mother's Day is okay;
>I don't need to see it. And don't forget to pick up something for my
>mother, too.
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>9. Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie.
>Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't . . . and if
>you are feeling amorous afterwards . . then I will certainly at least
>remember the name and recommend it to others.
>____________________________________
>
>10. Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought
>what
>you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is
>fine. With the belt or without it, looks fine. Your hair is fine. You
>look fine. Can we just go now?
>___________________________________________________________________
>
>11. Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2006, I will share
>equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking, the
>cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest. Like
>wandering around in the garden with a beer wondering what to do.
>
>This has been a public service message for women to better understand
>men....